Film

The Room (2003) dir. Tommy Wiseau

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You know, I had various ways I wanted to write this up. I wanted to deconstruct the greatness that is The Room, to look at why this film is a slice of brilliance and why it needs to be seen by every film goer imaginable. To take it apart and look at its merits and how it is a showcase to the love of the art form itself, and gave film geeks a certain holy book to worship. About maybe why The Room is the greatest film of all time. But I couldn’t do it, because everything that could have been said about The Room has been said about The Room. It’s a special kind of masterpiece, the type of film where, if nuclear war was about to break out, you know damn well it’d be the final film I’d watch.

If you haven’t seen The Room (which, if you haven’t, you better stop what you are doing and go buy/download it, or better yet go to the Coolidge Corner Theatre thonight at midnight for a good ole’ 35mm (!!!) showing of this piece of art), then the gist of it all is that Johnny (played wonderfully and elegantly by the great Tommy Wiseau, who also pulls triple duty with directing and writing on top of acting) lives with his fiancee Lisa (Juliette Danielle) in the city by the fault line San Francisco. As Johnny tries to pull his weight, Lisa starts to get bored with her lifestyle and decides to go behind Johnny’s back and seduce his charming best friend Mark (or Mahk) (Greg Sestero). What follows is a spiral down the rabbit hole of lies, deceptions, throwing footballs, petting dogs, and hanging out on a rooftop overlooking the CGI city of San Francisco.

The Room is a showcase into the weird and subversive side of cinema, to a point where I don’t even know if I could call it a film. At this point, The Room is a religion, a gathering of like-minded individuals who strive for the chance to please our lord and savior Tommy Wiseau with midnight screenings throughout the world. Move over Rocky Horror, the 2000s and the 2010s are owned by Tommy boy. I mean, come on, the film even has a dramatized movie about its making– entitled The Disaster Artist, with James Franco as Tommy– coming out later this year, how perfect is that?!? I’m going to stop before I get ahead of myself because I don’t need to persuade you into believing The Room is good. You know deep down its amazing. So, instead, I’ll leave you with the three best quotes Wiseau has to offer:

1) “I did not hit her, it’s not true! It’s bullshit! I did not hit her! I did not. Oh hi, Mark!”

2) “You betrayed me! You’re not good. You, you’re just a chicken. Chip-chip-chip-chip-cheep-cheep.”

3) “YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, LISA!”

Seriously, go see this fucking movie. This Friday. Coolidge. Midnight. Be there or be square.

The Room
2003
dir. Tommy Wiseau
90 min

Playing at the Coolidge Corner Theater in 35mm, Friday August 18th at Midnight!

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