
Red One is a heartily humored and stunningly visualized Christmas flick, but it’s sorely lacking everywhere else. In a world where a multilateral treaty between humans and mythological beings like elves and abominable snowmen is needed to calm violence, there exists the Mythological Oversight and Restoration Authority—M.O.R.A—to ensure peace. Red specifically follows Callum Drift (Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson), the discouraged head commander of Santa Claus’s (J.K. Simmons) ELF (Enforcement Logistics and Fortification) division of M.O.R.A. Having expressed this as his last Christmas run before retiring, it also becomes his most eventful: Santa gets kidnapped by a mysterious Black Ops team at the North Pole complex on Christmas Eve. He reports the kidnapping to his superior, Director Zoe Harlow (Lucy Liu), whose team discovers Santa’s location was leaked by a mercenary white-hat hacker, Jack O’Malley (Chris Evans). Upon catching and pressing the hacker, O’Malley admits he had no clue what he was linking or who to—just an anonymous information exchange. With his help, the trio and polar beargoes after Santa and his kidnapper, the snowy winter witch Grýla (Kiernan Shipka), and chaos ensues. It’s up to them to save Santa and Christmas before kids wake up presentless.
There’s not much to say quality-wise about Red One, because there’s not much that happens. The film runs overtime on plot, hoping to disguise otherwise hammy-at-best, cringy-at-worst one-liners and hollow attempts at characterization. The visuals are colorfully joyful—even if some creatures don’t look right, there’s always the badass polar bear Agent Garcia (Reinaldo Faberlle)—and the acting all around is buoyant enough, but there’s little intent beyond an otherwise cardboard, generic plot about how good ol’ Christmas spirit and a lot of action inspires hope. Of course Christmas is saved; of course people (re)discover their purposes; of course everything is happy. Red’s stakes are just greener than it intended. Random character developments get tossed about too, like when O’Malley’s estranged son Dylan (Wesley Kimmel) is suddenly brought in; there’s little not-thin mention of him or their relationship beforehand. Thus, Red One is dumb fun where you can turn your brain off and see some cool action, bromance and comedy, but not much else. For those looking for that mindless occupation, Red One may warm your cheeks—there’s nothing else on offer.
2024
dir. Jake Kasdan
123 min.
Opens in theaters everywhere Friday, 11/15