Pucker Up – Kissing Knives


It’s a strange world full of strange people. A few days ago I was walking in Harvard Square, delivering chrism to the seven churches, considering what would happen if I were to go into a full on epileptic fit. I was dizzy and leaning against a building trying to remember my name and where I was. Shaking like a leaf. Just then a man walked up to me and his eyes were completely black. “You gotta dollar?”

I shook my head and walked off to Leavitt and Peirce. I kneeled to look at a horrible image of Queen Victoria. “There is no way that is a human being.” I stood up only to get dizzy and feel my entire body surge with fluffy white tingles and everything went white. An older woman asked if I needed help, and I said I would be alright, only to realize she was asking if I wanted to purchase something. I told her what I wanted, waited for a few minutes while she got everything together and left.

The guy I saw before was on the corner and clearly didn’t recognize me because he asked if I had a dollar again. I gave him a pack of cigarette papers and $3. I have a theory the homeless and disenfranchised know more about the world than regular people. So I asked him who was responsible for distributing heroin in Boston. “Who do you think? The same people eating babies. Ask the Queen. I bet she knows all about it.”

I gave him a roll of quarters and left the city.

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