Johnnie & The Foodmasters are a long running Boston band and cultural phenomenon. I spoke with them about food, masters, and johnsons.
HASSLE:
Who is in the band and what do they play?
Johnnie Benjamin:
Johnnie G. Gordon – lead guitar Johnnie Bryant – drums ,Johnnie Benjamin – keyboard, Johnnie-Lynn Dee – bass, Johnnie D. Goode -tambourine Johnnie Red – guitar.
HASSLE:
How did the band get started?
Johnnie Benjamin: Johnnie G. Gordon and Johnnie Bryant worked at Johnnie’s Foodmaster and were inspired by the golden oldies that served as the supermarket’s soundtrack. They started the band and recruited the others to help do justice to these classic songs.
Johnnie D. Goode: On 4th of July 2015, we declared independence from the nation of generic rock. Except, I actually wasn’t present. They found me on the men’s room floor. In exchange for my record industry connections, I was offered the opportunity to join the band on tambourine, vocals, and shades.
Johnnie Red:
A science experiment gone wrong. A patriotic American speed trial. Some called in favors.
HASSLE:
What is a foodmaster?
Johnnie Red:
A dom in the kink-eating scene. But being 1950s suburbia, they couldn’t talk about that openly.
HASSLE:
What is a Johnnie?
Johnnie Red:
Once a paragon of 3-store grocery chains. Now a man who harasses us online.
HASSLE:
Why are we here?
Johnnie Benjamin: |
Because it’s scary out there.
Johnnie Bryant:
To rock the fuck out.
Johnnie-Lyn Dee:
I really have no idea anymore!
Johnnie Red:
To lower the bar for music acts everywhere. And to get banned from all remaining post-COVID Boston bar and house venues by sheer judgment of our music.
HASSLE:
The world of rock and roll… and almost everything else, has been on pause for a year. What if anything has the band been up to?
Johnnie Benjamin:
We’ve managed to stay in touch digitally and even managed to complete/release some recordings remotely.
Johnnie D Goode:
I’ve been listening to a shit ton of doo wop and some 80s hardcore (just got the SOA demo on vinyl!) and everything in between and then some. Peep the Johnnie and the Foodmasters’ Facebook page for an oldies jam practically every day. Especially deeper cuts. I like to make playlists. Maybe someday I’ll have a radio show. I fancy myself as some sort of Wolfman Jack or Bob Bittner. Someday. Johnnie G. Gordon and myself started the Kids Like You & Me (KLYAM) podcast.
HASSLE:
What other bands or shenanigans are the band members up to?
Johnnie D. Goode:
Insider trading, exercising, staying alive.
Johnnie Red:
Surfing New England waves. Cracking open Das Capital. Relating hard to George Costanza.
Johnnie-Lyn Dee:
I’ve written and recorded a few songs so there may be a possible solo EP in the future! Other than that I’ve been practicing to do 1000 ab exercises in one day.
HASSLE:
What’s next for the group?
Johnnie Benjamin:
We hope to come together once we’re vaccinated and rock harder than ever.ever.
Johnnie D. Goode:
Play some outside shows this Summer (or sooner) and play normal shows again indoors when it’s right. Then again, nothing about us is normal or right. I want to play out of town more too. Arenas, basements, stadiums, closets. No venue is too big or too small! First band to play on the moon. Lucia Pamela already beat us, but we’d be the first BAND and most likely the first BANNED.
Johnnie G. Gordon:
regroup on a stoop , play southBy , and make brisket with jandek
Johnnie Red:
A genny show somewhere in Massachusetts (shh…)
HASSLE:
There you have it, the greatest band in history. You are very welcome.
