Setting: Democracy Center in Harvard Square. YOU walk in to a dimly lit room where a bearded Jewish man known only as ARI sits, waiting patiently for YOU.

ARI: Please have a seat, I’m so glad you could join us today. I hear you’re interested in helping me with expanding BRAIN Arts’ film content?

YOU: I guess? There was this post on the Internet about it and I wasn’t really sure what it was about so I clicked on it anyway and then—

ARI: —OK, close enough. Whatever. Sounds good. Let’s cut to the chase. Did you get that? Cut? It’s a film joke!

YOU: That joke sucks.

ARI: If you’re going to help me you’re going to laugh at all my jokes. That part is not negotiable. Anyway, here’s the deal. I need help getting the Boston film scene organized because I can’t do it alone. I’m talking about online calendars filled with all the sickest film events going on in the city, working with our film writers to expand our coverage of the scene, and writing up featured films that you and I think are worth seeing. Stick with me, kid, and you and I might even throw our own film festival later this year.

YOU: Wow, that sounds pretty cool. I’m down, I’ll give it my best shot! Get it, shot? It’s another film joke!

ARI: That was terrible. Never tell your own jokes. Only I may tell jokes.

YOU: Um, OK. So how do I get started?

ARI: You should fill out our contact form and get in touch so we have all your information. And you might want to meet me here, at the Democracy Center, at 7pm every Monday so you can get plugged in to the rest of the organization. Do you have any questions?

YOU: Not right now, but I might later. What should I do?

ARI: Email me. I’m a very busy man, so it’s the fastest way to contact me—Directors have a lot to do, you know. Now get out of here, I have an important scene to grow. Scene—it’s another film joke, you see.

YOU politely get out of your chair and walk out of the Democracy Center, eager to work with ARI and disgusted by his terrible jokes.

END SCENE